Please, do not be alarmed by what you are about to read. It’s just that I have become organised. More than that, I organised myself to get organised. Lists of what I needed to do to be organised have been penned by my own hand. I know. It’s all a little too much.
There is a list of jobs the kids need to do each week before any cash is handed over. There is a menu plan. That has been stuck to. The menu plan has an attached shopping list. Which has been adhered to.
There is (and I am loathe to admit this) a weekly planner decal on the fridge. You know it’s a weekly planner because apart from the giveaway detail of the days of the week being on it, above the days it says WEEKLY PLANNER. In red. Clearly the planner means business. It is a whiteboard style planner. Wait, there’s more. The decal whiteboard WEEKLY PLANNER is branded Martha Stewart.
I am more than a little tempted to write meeting with parole officer under Monday.
The weekly planner alone would be one thing, but adjacent to this is a calendar. Here whole months of itineraries can be penciled in. Just waiting for the week to arrive when they are given pride of place on the WEEKLY PLANNER.
Now when the always hungry teen asks what’s for tea, I just have to point at the menu plan. Which I have craftily attached to the weekly chores chalkboard. If the daughter wants to know if her father or I are available to taxi her, she has places to look.
Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against being organised. It’s just that I have never done it before. Well, not in my house. Work is a lot more organised. Mostly.
I am curious now to see if it lasts. If a menu plan is stuck to. The weekly planner used, homework done, chores carried out. The problem is I feel bored already. I don’t like being told what to do, even when I am telling me to do it. See? Organisation is a nasty black hole of a matrix.
Fear not. I will not be updating progress. I have a feeling my own boring cleverness will swallow me whole and spit me out the other end, a little worse for wear. At my feet a range of unfinished tasks and half used menu plans, fallen from an overflowing recycling basket.
If all else fails, I can simply wipe the WEEKLY PLANNER clean and write gin and tonic on every single day.